If you market yourself properly, it’s possible with online dating and in the current dating climate to generate many dates with a wide variety of different partners in a relatively short time frame.
“Serial dating” has become a common practice in some singles circles. Some singles love the emotional rush of first dates. Others can’t find what they want. Still more find it difficult to resist all those offers. Previous generations may consider it “too much dating,” but this certainly isn’t everyone’s opinion.
Non-exclusive dating—that is, dating more than one person at a time—requires respect and good intent. There’s nothing wrong with testing the dating waters before jumping in with both feet. When one person invariably rises above the crowd, most people naturally begin focusing exclusively on that person, and stop dating the others. Dating non-exclusively can be a good way to use the process of elimination to discover what type of person you really desire to be with.
So if you’re seeking an exclusive, long-term partner, what happens if you’ve met multiple you’d like to pursue, but you don’t know which one you want to end up with? Is it possible to successfully date non-exclusively? Can you date too much?
Yes, dating too much is a thing. So it all depends on the way you do it. It’s important to proceed in a respectful, honest, and very open way. If you want to successfully date non-exclusively, then you need to keep a few important tips in mind.
• Always be fair and honest. Don’t let anyone think that that you’re dating exclusively if you aren’t. Keep the “Golden Rule” in mind: treat other people the way you want other people to treatyou. (Hhowever, this doesn’t mean that you need to kiss and tell!)
• Manage your expectations. If you don’t have any expectations, you can’t be disappointed if your expectations aren’t getting met. Don’t make promises that you don’t intend to keep, and don’t let yourself get caught up in the heat of the moment. If you aren’t being exclusive but the other person is, try to make it clear that you aren’t on the same page in this regard.
• Enjoy the moment. Let things flow naturally, and try toenjoy the process. This will help you make sound decisions about your dates. Don’t concern yourself with long-term issues at this point. First and second dates should be about getting to know the other person, to see if you’d like to pursue something more. So don’t place undue pressure on them, or on yourself.
• Be realistic. If you’re out there “playing the field,” it’s likely they are, too. Don’t assume they’re being exclusive with you and not seeing others, unless you’ve explicitly discussed this.
• Date with a purpose. Keep dating fun, but be sure you don’t let your vision of your desired outcome be clouded. So be honest with yourself about whatthat desired outcome is. If you’re dating in hopes of beginning a long-term relationship, it’s important to narrow your field as soon as you can. Don’t spend more time with someone if you already know they’re not “the one” you’re looking for.
• Avoid dating fatigue. Don’t date so much that you want to completely stop dating. It is possible to over-do dating!
• Schedule wisely. This is probably the most important tip of all! Be sure you don’t ever, ever double-book!
You will usually know after a few dates if you want to continue seeing somebody. Eventually, you’ll naturally end some dating relationships in favor of others. In summary, don’t lose sight of your goal. You want to get to know your dates better so you can discern if they’re the right one for you. If you want a long-term relationship, then non-exclusively dating multiple partners should be just a temporary arrangement.
While dating should have a purpose, it should also be fun. Keep that in mind, and you will enjoy your experience all the more.
So, what do you think? Is there really such a thing as too much dating? Or is non-exclusive dating necessary in today’s dating climate? Please share your perspectives and thoughts in the comment section below!